Casimir Pulaski Day

Most people who read my blog will already know this song. But if you don't, you should.

This is my favourite song by one of my favourite artists, Sufjan Stevens. Casimir Pulaski Day tells a very tragic story. And addresses the struggle man can be faced with they don't understand what the heck God is doing. You knwo when, you just wanna shake him and scream in his face and tell him he's wrong? Yeah. Kinda touches on that. Beautiful piece of art.

There's a link to a youtube video witht he song on it HERE

You can follow the lyrics bellow


Golden rod and the 4-H stone
The things I brought you
When I found out you had cancer of the bone

Your father cried on the telephone
And he drove his car to the Navy yard
Just to prove that he was sorry

In the morning through the window shade
When the light pressed up against your shoulder blade
I could see what you were reading

Oh the glory that the lord has made
And the complications you could do without
When I kissed you on the mouth

Tuesday night at the bible study
We lift our hands and pray over your body
But nothing ever happens

I remember at Michael's house
In the living room when you kissed my neck
And I almost touched your blouse

In the morning at the top of the stairs
When your father found out what we did that night
And you told me you were scared

Oh the glory when you ran outside
With your shirt tucked in and your shoes untied
And you told me not to follow you

Sunday night when I cleaned the house
I find the card where you wrote it out
With the pictures of your mother

On the floor at the great divide
With my shirt tucked in and my shoes untied
I am crying in the bathroom

In the morning when you finally go
And the nurse runs in with her head hung low
And the cardinal hits the window

In the morning in the winter shade
On the first of March on the holiday
I thought I saw you breathing

Oh the glory that the lord has made
And the complications when I see his face
In the morning in the window

Oh the glory when he took our place
But he took my shoulders and he shook my face
And he takes and he takes and he takes.

Thought

it's a shame I have been drinking my coffee black for the last few years.
I really miss the swirl of cream in a steaming coffee mug.

That is all.

Religion

I haven't really liked the word Religion in the past. I've always used "spirituality" or "Faith" but lately I'm really liking the use of it.

I was explaining to a co-worker when i say Religion I'm taking about community. Friends. People i can share my life with. What's so bad about that?

The word religion has been very taboo in modern times. It's come to mean a legalistic condemnation of people you don't know and who (interestingly enough) don't profess faith in Christ. So why bug them?

That's not my Religion. Religion is love for friends. Breaking of bread amongst people. And yes, at times, expressing concern over someone's life! But people I love and who I have earned the right to do that with.

I feel so good knowing I am confortable using the Word religion. I couldn't do that before!

And I'm even learnign to Speak Christian, which is weird for me! But it's kinda cool too! I'm seeing words like blessing, rejoice and praise coming into my regular vocabulary. Hmm. A change from where I've come from, to say the very least!

ChristianLife-Truth

I've had a lot of time lately to think about what exactly it means to live in a Christian community. It's a tough thing to ask yourself, mainly because so many people see it in different ways. I have had many different tastes of what one would call fellowship. Mostly good, but some negative. The negative ones seem to stick out in my mind more... not because I hang on to the negative, but they are the ones that i feel like I learned the most from.

The biggest negative experiences I have had with Christian life have usually revolved around lifestyle choices that people have not approved of. Mainly Shawna and I living under the same roof. That was, without a doubt, one of the hardest parts of my life in a Christian community. Mainly because most people didn't seem to care about how our life was being lived. Instead, they were concerned about the illusion that it conveyed. I say most, not all. Some people whom I have a deep respect and love for (who may very well read this) came to me out of love and told me they disagreed. And that's fine. In fact, that's great! More and more, I am believing that God speaks subjective truths to individuals. I was confused when someone whom I respect came to me and said "I disagree. Here is my argument." and I said "Well, I am not of the same opinion. Here is my argument." We both made valid, solid points, and yet we left the conversation completely unconvinced of each other's opinion. It was interesting because he said something along the lines of "I don't know how to feel. Becasue either the Lord is speaking through me and I'm right, or he's speaking through you and you're right." At face value I wasn't sure how to take that comment. The more I thought about it, wresttled with it and prayed about it the more I relized that I disagreed. Maybe God is speaking through both of us. Maybe that the truths that God has are so profound that they seem contradictory to our feeble minds. I mean, think about the amount of blatant contradictions in the books of the law. Obviously, God isn't worried about his 'rules' being lived in contrasting ways. We can all agree on the ten rules that govern our life, (The commandments) but other than that it's open to interpretation. I'm reading "The Year of Living Biblically" right now and he touches on that so much. The amount of people that interpret the law in completely different ways. They can't all be right, can they? I would say yes. If we, as believers, can find a way that the law and God's word can speak truth and Holliness into our lives, why should we stop it? God's truth is eternal... now I don't know about you guys, but I can't grasp the concept of eternal truth. Don't you think that the Lord is gonna dumb it down for my feeble insgnifigant mind in order to make me understand it on a personal RELATIONAL level!?! Why not? This is the God who holds the cosmos in his hands people! Why wouldn't he? He would REJOICE at being able to relate with us on such a subjective level!

Even Jesus did it. I mean When the disciples got mad at Mary for annointing him with oils instead of selling them to feed the poor, he said "Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, but you will not always have me." (Matthew 26) In contrast, when asked how he could get into heaven, he told the rich man "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your posessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in Heaven. Then come, follow me." (Matthew 19) Isn't it interesting how God can speak two completely different messages to people who are in completely different places in life and in their relationship with him!?! I love it.

I don't have any answers. Just my thoughts on truth and how the eternal truth relates to us on individual levels. I think it's gloriously quasi-contradictory. I love it!

Thoughts on Hallow's Eve

Not entirely sure what this post is gonna touch on. I'm just gonna use my blog as a vehicle to express my frustrations with Hallowe'en. I love it as a secular holiday. It's a great time for people to express their creativity in countless ways; they can carve pumpkins, make costumes, face paint, host a haunted house, tell ghost stories and countless other things.

So amongst all these possible activities and tradition where did this idea of using Hallowe'en as a reason to dress in barely any clothing come from? I don't understand it. You can ask the vast majority of young women (and the odd cougars) what they are dressing up as and they'll tell you "a school teacher" or "a police officer" or "dorothy from the wizard of oz." And those all seem like perfectly acceptable costumes. Of course, when they show up on Hallowe'en night you see that your school teacher has a plaid skirt and a meter long ruler, your police officer has a badge that says "officer naughty" and a pair of handcuffs and your Dorothy, well... I'll let Paris field That one!

So, why? Why do women do that? It doesn't stop at hallowe'en either. In my university years I was exposed to countless themed parties and events that just perpetuated this degradation of women. "Tennis pros and Tennis Hoes?" Nice. Really nice. But still... why? The question I am askign myself is, was it like this when I was a kid? Obviously when I was young, I didn't pay attention to much other than what I was doing for hallowe'en. As a result, I have no recollection as to whether or not this is a new phenomenon or something that has appeared in the past few years.

My instinct (and discussions I have had with people on the matter) lead me to believe that this is in fact a relatively new thing. What can we credit it to? Well the obvious answers lead me to the beauty industry and the sexualization of the media and music industries. There are other factors, but these are obviously major players. To boil it down western society seems to perpetuate constant feelings of inadequacy in its populace. We are never smart enough, pretty enough, strong enough, skinny enough, nice enough, funny enough, green enough, liberal enough, conservative enough, moral enough, ad nauseum. Particularly with women. Women simply are not pretty enough, skinny enough or sexy enough. So they over compensate. I know countless girls who have told me that they would rather be looked at as an object of sexuality than not looked at at all. We've created a society where women - the bearers of our children- would rather where a low cut shirt and short skirt and have men drool ove them as they would when smelling a porkchop over the BBQ than be loved for who they are.

So how do we solve this problem? Short answer: I don't know.

I really don't. I know it makes me angry. I know it makes me not want to leave the house on Hallowe'en night. I know it makes me wonder if I should have kids because I'd be immersing them in a society that glorifies sexual belittling.

I don't know. Like with so many things in this society, I feel liek we're too far gone.